I’M STARTING THERAPY IN A WEEK

Those are words are never thought I would say…

and to be honest, I am still scared to say them.

I hit a breaking point recently where I had to take a hard look at myself and acknowledge that I needed help with my personal wellbeing and guidance in my life. I have a problem of things needing to be “perfect.” This has caused my anxiety to be the most intense it has ever been…

The pressure of telling myself that I need to have everything figured out is altering my mindset. The mindset to have fun, to let loose, to be a 24 year old woman. The pressure I have been putting on myself has made me lose myself. Over the last couple months, I have lost the girl who I loved and who I worked so hard to be.

I have always been a person who could compartmentalize all the things in my life. This compartmentalization started becoming a problem. I wasn’t paying attention to things in my life that needed it. I was getting overwhelming stress and anxiety to the point where I didn’t know how to control it myself. I was becoming to the outside world but where was I on the inside? Nowhere. Blank. Numb. I was going through the days just existing.

I knew when I recognized that I was losing myself, that I needed to find myself again. For me, this is going to be probably the most scary thing ill do. If you know me, I am an open book when it comes to talking about myself but I stop that when it comes to discussing my feelings. Especially when it digs things up that I don’t want to discuss.

BUT I need to.

I am ready for therapy to help me be honest with myself, to build a healthy relationship with myself, to love myself, to create habits, and most of all… to help me find my passion and love for this life of mine.